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2009, bitches.

31 December 2008

CONVERSION NOTICE: This is one of 250+ blogs that originally appeared on MySpace. I’ve done my best to represent it with as much historical accuracy as possible, but there are limitations. Read about it in the FAQ.

Current Mood:  contemplative

It’s New Year’s Eve, and I’m staying home.  Let’s be frank.  NYE is amateur night, baby.  This is the night when even the people who don’t normally go out still go out.  And the bars and clubs know it, and they charge ridiculous covers.  And the SF streets are gridlocked with bridge-and-tunnel people.  And drunk drivers.

Not that any of these things have stopped me in the past.  So what’s the deal really?  OK, well let’s be really frank.  2008 was one of the worst years I can remember, and I don’t particularly feel like celebrating it.  But as I did for 2006, 2007, and 2008 (sorta), I thought I’d take a few minutes to wrap up the last year and ring in 2009.  This year, I’ll do it Sergio Leone style, and I’ll also keep it short.

The Good
Well first off, I’m fortunate to be alive and have my physical health.  In this economy, I’m also fortunate to be employed and financially stable.  I’m thankful for all my family and friends, their support, and their health and well-being.  I met several great new friends this year, and I got to spend a lot of time with my friends, new and old.  I saw a lot of excellent bands.  I met Duran Duran.  I headlined Slim’s, and played a ton of other great shows.  I was interviewed and played a few songs live on the radio.  I appeared in one of Morrissey’s videos.  As a nation, we elected Obama.  Bush’s considerable days in office are numbered.  That political nightmare is almost over.  The thing I’m most proud of this year is that I took the initiative to turn my peaceful life upside down in the name of opening my mind, and though I’m still dealing with the fall out of the Pandora’s box I set loose, in the end I think it will have been worth it, and that I’ll be a better person for it.  I’m making progress.

The Bad
There’s no question that the world got darker this year.  Or put more delicately, I’ll say it was challenging.  It was also the fastest year of my life yet.  Maybe that’s good since it was such a miserable year.  But then, it only serves to make me feel all the more that I’m wasting my youth.  I have a lot of regrets.  All those loud shows and practices without ear plugs led me to develop tinnitus this year, which still hasn’t gone away and may never.  I gave up on the original band I started, and I didn’t pick it up again.  In the working through of psychological issues, I made mistakes in relationships and became unable/unwilling to invest in them anymore.  California passed Prop. 8.  And of course one of the biggest stories of my adult life so far is panic/anxiety and how severely it has impacted my day-to-day life for most of 2008.

The Ugly
Mother’s Cookies went out of business.  I will never taste those delicious treats again.

2009, and beyond…
So there you have it.  What am I proud of and what do I regret about 2008.  I’m looking forward to shaking things up this year.  I live in the same place I have for years.  I work at the same job, go to the same restaurants and clubs.  I play the same music at the same shows.  There’s nothing wrong with that.  I enjoy those things.  But I’ve lived that year already.  A few times in a row now, in fact.  When I’m laying on my deathbed, I don’t want to look back on my life and feel like I found a comfortable pattern and stuck with it for a decade.  I want to make sure I’m infusing some new things in there too.  There’s so much to see and do out there.  Why waste year after year doing the things you’ve already done?  Well at least that’s where my head’s at this moment.  We’ll see if it sticks.

Before embarking on all that though, a great TCB show is coming up.  This Friday we’re at Du Nord, and the past two shows there have been a lot of fun, not to mention sell outs!  Get your tickets early, and hope to see you all there!  There’s even a rumor the Moz Krew might show up…

As I said, I’ll be around tonight, doing some serious reflecting on the last year and what I want to accomplish next year.  An exercise to consider… imagine yourself a year from now.  And ask, “what would the future me say he regrets about 2009?”  And now, “what can I do to change what he had to say?”  There’s a lot to think about for 2009, and for the rest of my life in general.

It’s been a bad year, kiddies.  2008: don’t let the door hit you on the way out.  And good riddance!  The quote of the week… er… year… comes from Bill Vaughan:

“An optimist stays up until midnight to see the new year in.  A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.”

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4 Comments to “2009, bitches.”

  1. Seeing as it’s 3:13 am, does that make me a pessimist??

    Benjamin, very glad to know you.

    I owe you big time for comin’ to pick my drunk a** up!

    HOPE (yep, that’s a Shepards Ferry poster reference if I ever heard one!) ’09 is kind to us good people…

    PS- were the cookies still passably yummy??

  2. this blinkered lush... (Joyce)

    i’m a pessimist! hahaha! there was beauty in ’08, but much more death & pain, than i care to relive. sorry, that’s the Asti talking! 😉 Cheers Ben! this shall be one helluva year for all!

  3. this blinkered lush... (Joyce)

    Um, did you forget to include seeing Mr. Marr, this past summer? I would think that to be a, “Good.” Oops, almost typed God! 😉

  4. I think a bright spot in 2008 was meeting you. Or should it be the other way around. You meeting me. Yeah I like that better! 😛

    I still have some Mothers cookies left in my pantry if you want some. I’ll share with you anytime! 🙂

    I was a optimist for New Years for sure! I can’t wait for you to shake things up too!

    My favorite 2008 quote (or text actually) from Ben is… “Deanna+Lemon Drops+Camera=Don’t Mix!” I spared posting that pic of you though. Still makes me laugh! 😀

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