THE LAST WORDS
In August 2005, I was taking photos around the apartment I was living in. This was just days before I moved out, following my friend and roommate Jared’s departure. I just found one I snapped of the magnetic fridge poetry as it was last left by us and the various guests we’d had over that year. For no good reason I can think of, I decided to transcribe them here. Enjoy!
- WHAT HAS HE DONE TO THOSE THINGS
- IT ‘S NOT A RACE
- BE N AIN’T WRONG
- BACK FOR YOU
- I HAVE HAPPINESS DESPITE THE LACK OF ANYONE ELSE
- GUYS ARE 100% MEAN
- THINK YOU’RE NICE AND YOU ARE LAST
- OVERTIP SOMEBODY LONELY
- WHY ALL THE SHORT DOGS
- HIS BIG FINISH IN YOUR BUTTER
- RATE OF MY LIFE
- CAN OURS BE USED TO WIN ?
- THE 30TH WOMAN IS RARELY PLEASED
- YOU HAVE QUESTIONS?
SHE HAS ANSWERS
BUT THEY ARE ALWAYS ALWAYS WRONG
SERIOUSLY
ALWAYS - YOU’RE A GREAT PESSIMIST
- NEVER BACK DOWN
- 99% HUMOR FREE PANTS
- YOU ARE GOING TO GET IT ANY WAY
- YOU’LL SENSE WHO COST THE MOST
- WE ARE ALL SO DOWN WITH SUNSHINE
- THE LAST WORDS
- DO WHOEVER EVER
- PUT YOUR THINGS IN THEIRS
- THE MORE YOU KNIFE PEOPLE, THE FUNNIER IT GET S
- BUT YOU’RE ALREADY PERFECT
- YOU HAVEN’T WRITTEN TOO MUCH
- EMBARRASSING PICK-UP LINES ABOUT EASIEST CHICKEN FAILURE
- WASN’T IT A DAY FOR FALLING
- FORGIVE PEOPLE THEIR GRAMMAR !
- KEEP YOUR EASY FRIENDS
INTELLIGENCE IS NOT IMPORTANT
HIT THAT - FEBRUARY IS EXTREMELY DARK
- DON’T OVERSHADOW YOUR CYNIC
- SHOULDN’T YOUR SUSPENDERS HAVE FLOWERS
- BEST BUCKS ASKING AWARD
- IN THE SENSE
- EVERYTHING DOESN’T HAVE HUMOR LIKE GIRLFRIENDS
- TALKING SAID SPEECHES HEARD
- YOU SEXY THING
- DOESN’T HAVE GYROS
- PRODUCER SAID ONLY IF HERS BE TO FINER
- MAY ALL AND TO CROSS ED COLLAR DULL
- THE ROAD IS ALSO CLOUDING
- CHORES _____ EVERY DAY
P.S. GOOD SONGS - LAUGHS MAY SEE QUIRKS OF YOURSELF
- SOMEONE THAT YOU MIGHT THINK TO SHARE MANY . . .
- FAN OF THE EIGHTIES
I can’t say for sure, but if I recall, I think in general most of the dirty ones were mine, the gloomy ones were Jared’s, and the incoherent ones were from our guests… because neither of us would have stood for that. And hopefully it goes without saying, but I wouldn’t read too much into any of this. Let’s remember we were idly moving magnets around on the fridge, not confessing anything about our respective essences. Though it may still be fair to say that it was a different world back when we roamed the earth.
Listening to: Orange Juice – “Coals To Newcastle”
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I bet 25 is yours huh?
Actually, yes!