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I’m Dying

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3 Comments to “I’m Dying”

  1. You are NOT dying Benjamin. When the occasion calls for it, if I happen to have my Nano with me, I WILL drop my headphones on the ground for emphasis. I think it’s a subtle movement, but the ping/plop shows I’m trying to make my point. If only Jemily hadn’t burst into laughter and said she thought it was the funniest thing she’s ever seen me do in the one time I’ve attempted such emphasis. Since you do not see me with a Nano – unless you have a third eye like I do…do you??? – then I have to resort to ‘Benjamin’. So again. You are NOT dying Benjamin. Get a grip. Get a teddy bear. Get a wubby.

    Did your co-worker actually say the letters LOL or Laugh Out Loud? Neither is preferable in verbal form. Just laugh. A-HA!!! (Did you hear yourself do the laugh just now?!?) Your co-worker is a pigeon. The lowest form of bird. The rat version of a bird. In human form, we call that a horse’s ass. Were you also asked if you would like your steak cooked rare or well-done with that chicken soup? Pluck You Benjamin’s co-worker for not being more sensitive! Pluck You.

    You need to be getting ahold of me for vegetable soup, hot tea, warm soft blankets, cough drops or instead of all of those, to borrow my teddy bear.

    Get better by Sunday. And yes, I gave ROCKSTAR (Nick’s New “Nick”name) a hard time for saying that.

    P.S. I’m gonna rename that song to “My House Is A Pigsty” by the way. It’ll be my autobiographical song reflecting the state of my home sweet home.

  2. I’d say that if you were dead, we wouldn’t be able to hear you. Because dead people can be seen, not heard, right? You wouldn’t be able to talk. Or the movie would’ve been “Sixth and Seventh Sense”.

    I just listened to your voicemail. You are so congested…I could only pick up some key words: Hello, this, is, Benjamin, sounds, Orlando, call.

    I’m going to call you back and probably do most of the talking now. Press ‘1’ for ‘Yes’, ‘2’ for ‘No’.

  3. Pistol Packin' Mama

    i’m sorry your not feeling well i hope you start to feel better soon. But dont fret… I had enough fun for the both of us at disneyland yesturday 😀 and drank enough for both of us on friday 😀 take care of yourself and get better!!!

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